Nothing makes my blood boil more than blatant discrimination against hippos, and the latest antics of Facebook really take the cake. I didn't really want to join the blasted site in the first place anyway, but was persuaded to do so to help out some friends running an online publicationin whose pages I hope one day to appear.
Date of birth was the first hurdle: it didn't seem to like the fact that my last reanimation dates from 2006, so I decided on 1949, the year Lego first switched from wooden to plastic building blocks.
That one cunningly solved, I then discovered that the site didn't think Hugo the Hippo was my real name -- though it did patronisingly offer me a link at which, as the proprietor of an unreal name, I could plead my cause. No thank you! Hippos, unlike humans, are creatures of honour.
I will have my revenge: a human strike force is in training as we speak, and Facebook's goal of world domination will soon be mine.
It's time to show your true colours, humans: in the words of the greatest leader of the Free World, you're either with us or against us!
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